Nightmares

Ever since I came back to Dunny, I've been having nightmare after nightmare hit me again and again. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that the late hours and the long working nights and the sleeping in the wee early hours of the morning have contributed somewhat but it has also seemed like all my fears in one place have resurrected themselves and they seem to plague me every time I close my eyes. I must admit, sometimes, I'm lucky and I get away with a sleepless dream and I wake up feeling normal.

Okay, that's my normal me. You see, I usually don't have dreams. Not any kind of dream at all. Its just a blank that I go into whenever I decide to shut my eyes and hibernate for the following 8 hours. 

And I'm usually okay with that.

On the occasion, I do get a dream that I literally do not want to wake up from and will ply myself with tons and tons of alcohol + any other sedative within reach just to get back to Lala land. 

And more often than not, if I do get a dream, its one that disturbs me.

Okay, so I don't need very much to disturb me.

As a child, I would always get some dream or rather about a wild animal chasing me and then as it lunges for me with mouth wide open and fangs glistening, I wake up. Hate that one.

And this year...where do I begin?

Recently, my dreams have been about exams. About being late for exams, about not knowing where the venue is for the exams, about not knowing how to do exam questions, about having exams. In short.

I've also had a dream or two about losing a friend. Guy or girl, it doesn't matter. Its just that s/he's gone and I've lost my entire world.

And last night, boy. I must say that's probably the worst so far.

I dreamt that I managed to piss everyone off. And every single person that I pissed off was someone I held in high regard or else, I considered as a good friend. Every single person.

Dear god.

Now if you think having animals bite you is bad, wait til you have pissed off everyone you like in one sitting.

Made me want to move to WangyWangy even more. Sigh.

I've kinda given up hope on this brain. Whatever la.